A Trans Woman Changing Adult Entertainment

Anyone that has read my blogs over the years know that what I write has nothing to do with plugging others. It's purely about my experiences in kink and sexuality. I prefix because I'm about to "plug" someone without the intentions of giving her more popularity 1) she's already popular and 2) she is in my mind breaking boundaries in the transgender porn world and I very much appreciate that.

For starters... Time passes us all by and I feel that I accomplished a lot as a male submissive in front of the camera but it was always a means to an end for me. None the less, I've always ran in the adult entertainment world in some aspect, and as I've transitioned I find myself thinking that I pretty much feel like an outsider because I'm not working in adult film as a trans woman the way I worked in Femdom as a male submissive. Not due to lack of opportunity but simply out of choice. But the people I run with very often are still involved so I'm experienced, yet I'm not "in their world". So I find it interesting but I'll admit I find the trans women porn world to be over the top repetitive.

So seeing what Natalie Mars has done pushing limits in kink is beyond refreshing.
The funny thing is New Years Eve, Lexi Sindel invited me and my partner to Vegas to welcome in the New Year with her. So I'm at her house and Lexi and other peeps are getting ready to go out, as am I and she tells me that someone will be coming over soon. So I open the door and it's Natalie Mars and I have absolutely no idea who she is. I'm like cool, another girl and we are all going to have a good time.

So long story short of the night it was a blast. Natalie and I got to know each other better and 2 days later we shot our first scene together w/ Lexi Sindel and Mistress Tangent. If you don't know about it yet it was an amazing day with a focus on over the top femininity and sissy play as two trans woman. I go back with Lexi shooting from the age of 23 and I'm 31 now. It's weird when your kink idols become your friends. But some how she always comes up with fucked up, weird, kinky shit which as a kinkster I appreciate. I also love how Lexi always pushes the limits, where I'm going with this is so many trans women feel uncomfortable with crossdressers or sissy play because they don't want to be labeled that. However as a kinkster I still find sissy, over the top femininity arousing. On a personal level I've purposely stopped shooting heavily for years. But going back to my original topic, that is exactly why I tip my hat to Natalie Mars. She is the first and only trans woman who pushes kink while being a trans porn star and to me that is powerful.

Think about it. There are a million trans girl sites. A million BDSM sites that involve men, women, and even some that involve trans women but the ones with trans women all 100% relate back to sex. It's almost like trans women aren't allowed to be kinky and ironically as someone who runs in both worlds, so many trans women are kinky.

So I'll write about it and Natalie Mars can break boundaries. Some examples......

She proposed a fucking machine to Grooby Girls and got it done. First time ever and to put it nicely, it's a very popular video.

What takes more courage is taking a taboo fetish, that's even taboo in kink. And that's ABDL (Adult Baby, Diaper Lovers) those terms can be one in the same or completely separate. Personally I've been a DL lover all my life but even as open and kinky as I am it took me a very long time to be open about it cause even to me it seemed "weird". Now, not so much but it takes such courage as a trans porn star like her who is so popular to not only open up about it, but expose it, show it and talk about it and that is powerful.

Additionally she has done a lot of Femdom, bondage, and more. In some ways I feel like I am her. I guarantee you she had no idea who I was until I met her. But that doesn't mean I didn't influence people, I know I did, I've been told so many stories and I appreciate that. For me, the most powerful thing about being in front of the camera was others willingly opening up to me about their stories, it's that-that I love. Because we all have a story. I feel that my blog has ALWAYS been about sharing an inside light on things that those note involved wouldn't know, but I feel is important to know. And to me, what Natalie Mars is doing is a HUGE step in adult entertainment for trans people. Instead of simply being what someone fetish-sizes she's saying I also have fetishes and I'm willing to share with the world. And I, SOOOOOOO Love that!

Coming & Going

I'll be leaving Ohio in 9 days, this time I hope it's forever. After I spent my senior year of high school in Ohio I moved out on my own at 18 and back to Chicago. I never thought I'd end up back in Ohio but obviously that didn't exactly go as planned. I've spent the past 2 1/2 years in Ohio and I have no plans on ever living here again. It feels great to have earned my Bachelors degree and now I'm ready to move on to the next phase of life.

Stop 1: Chicago. I would've liked to of been staying in Chicago this summer because it would make my life easier with an internship and truthfully most of my time spent will be in Chicago (Internship, kink, bars, friends etc). With that said, I'm staying at an apartment in Des Plaines because my best friend just got a new apartment and I'm staying with him. We are really tight and if I am going to be living in Arizona for the next few years I want us to have a good summer together before I go again. Everyone that knows me knows how close me and my friend Jamal are. I know it's important to him that I'm around and it's important to me that we can at worst have one last go at a fun summer.

I've been talking with a lot of models and dommes to shoot with this summer. It's looking like it will be a good summer for filming. I personally haven't filmed in about 3 months and have maybe only filmed 10 times over the past 9 months. Being that it was my senior year and I was taking more than a full load of credits, I had my hands full. I've got a lot of new women that I have plans with for filming purposes. I've also got some people that I've shot with in the past as well. I even got a sexy femme sissy that I have plans to shoot with.

I plan on shooting a lot of diverse material. Putting myself into a lot of crazy kinky, humiliating, degrading, mind blowing circumstances and best of all I'm looking forward to it. I'm always pushing/expanding my own limitations and finding new things that get me off. I'm also focusing on doing a lot of trade for content work meaning all of my shoots will become available at my video store for you to cum and enjoy - AEB Femdom

I'm also looking forward to just attending some kink events this summer. It's been awhile since I've done so. Last year I had a great time at the LRA 4th of July kink celebration so I hope to attend that again this year. I believe it's actually on the 3rd of July. The Chicago legend and my friend Mortis has been teaching kink classes in town again so I hope to catch one of his classes and hopefully I'll make it to Carnel for my first time among some other kinky ongoings.

I'm ready to kick off a hard-working and hard-playing extravagant kink filled summer in Chicago.

Additionally, I wanted to note that I've added a few features to my blog over the past few months. To the right you can see my Clips4sale store. Most recently added are the "Who do you think you are" videos. Which has some really hot strap-on/ass fucking scenes, forced orgasms, blackmail, and humiliation. To the right you can see my Amazon wish list for those that ask for it and wish to get me some gifts. Near the top and again to the right is a new "Share it" feature allowing you to easily share my blog with others on Facebook and Twitter. I've also added a feature that counts the hits this blog gets. It's up to almost 30,000 which is awesome!

The Male Submissive

I've had active kinky profiles online since the age of 17. Yes, I was underage just like many of you were the first time you looked at porn and or flipped through a Playboy magazine. I've known I was kinky long before that but none-the-less, I've been active on kink based social networking sites for over 9 years now as I'll be 26 in early September. The social networking sites themselves have drastically improved over the years however there is one thing that always seems to remain constant.

The way male submissive's act online.

These male submissive's discuss their problems in finding a play partner and or a dominant to serve. They will complain about everything under the sun.

• Too many Pro-Dommes
• Nobody seems to be real
• Everyone wants something in exchange
• No one responds to me

The real problem is in that of the male submissive.

To start, when a male sub contacts someone they hope to serve they should write more than one line.

"Hey, you're beautiful. I'd love to worship your feet, that really turns me on" Just doesn't cut it.

Follow this Top 10 List:

1. Make sure you have correct spelling. 

2. Don't contact someone and tell them what you expect. 

3. Perhaps you should leave your name. 

4. It helps if you've filled out your own profile. 

5. Properly introduce yourself. 

6. Be polite 

7. Don't send a 2nd, 3rd, 4th and so on email within hours or days of not receiving a response. 

8. Don't contact a Pro Domme and then get mad when money is asked of you.

9. READ the profile of the person you're contacting.

10. Don't jerk off while contacting the person you're interested in

You would think that this would be common sense. Unfortunately for many, common sense goes out the door in the world of sex.

There are lots and lots of dominants and switches out there that are interested and seeking submissive males. However, sitting on your internet and not following proper writing etiquette nor showing a common courtesy to someone isn't going to get you very far.

There is a very large abundance of male subs who feel that they will never get an opportunity to serve a dominant. That the stories they read and the pictures they view will be the closest that they will ever get. 

I get a lot of emails on my Fetlife account from male submissive's of all ages in regards to these topics. Asking about how to get more involved. Telling me that I'm lucky and they wish that they could be me. I've been asked on how to send emails to dominants as well. I always respond as I try to assist those truly seeking out advice. I can be a fun-loving narcissist sometimes but for the large part I'm a humble person. I created my luck in kink. I wasn't born into the world of sexual exploration. I sought it out and with time I learned to accept myself but also study sexual alternatives.

Probably the most common question I get is: How did I get to be so involved?

Male submissives realize that it's not easy to be a male submissive and yet they assume that the world was given to me. To shorten up a long story here is my Timeline into BDSM.

- Age 17, I skipped a basketball game and saw a Pro Domme in Chicago. I paid $200 for the hour. I was extremely nervous but it was the best experience of my life.

- Age 18, In Ohio and saw a Pro Domme in the Cleveland area. Paid $300 for the hour.

- Age 18, moved back to Chicago after graduation & saw a Pro Domme I had been talking with online for 2 years now. She wouldn't see me till I turned 18. I paid $200 for the hour.

- Age 18, almost 19 I saw that same Pro Domme. This time I paid $100 cash & $100 in a giftcard that I had to Extreme Restraints.

- Age 19, Saw the same Pro Domme but we had worked out a 6 month slave training contract between us. I cleaned her dungeon twice a week in exchange for play. I only got play if I had done a good job.

- Age 19, Came out to my friends as being "Kinky" as they started to notice that I was hiding things from them.

- Age 19, Attended Fetishcon in Tampa Bay, Florida with 3 "vanilla" friends. Definitely didn't go as planned with my friends but in the long run was a good experience.

- Age 20, I was no longer serving the same Domme. I was upset that we broke it off but I was starting college. A few months later, although nervous I began attending Nawa Shibari Chicago by myself. A Rope bondage/Kink group.

- Age 20, Decided to put up pictures online about wanting to be a fetish model. I did this to get into the 21+ kinky clubs in Chicago. I also did it to meet more people and hopefully find someone to serve. Dvnt of Chicago who also ran Nawa Shibari Chicago contacted me about being in a live performance at a kinky club.

- Age 20, months later I began serving Miss Jaded who also helped run Nawa Shibari Chicago. Soon after I was attending 2-6 kinky functions in Chicago every month. 6 months later I began a personal relationship on top of a D/s relationship with Miss Jaded.

- Age 20-23, Attended Fetishcon, Atlanta Bound, Shibaricon twice. Assisted in presenting at classes at national conventions and local conventions. Started meeting a lot of big named Dommes, models, and photographers. Had my own members site and became part owners in a new Chicago dungeon - The Studio Chicago. Began filming as a male bottom in femdom based videos as well as doing fetish modeling for still photos. Also worth noting, I was a full time college student and worked some part-time jobs.

- Age 23, split with Miss Jaded and I moved to Ohio to stay with my mother for about 9 months. I lost my co-signer with college and was forced to take a year off from school. I took a much needed brake from kink as I was getting over a break up and needed time for myself. I got 1 full time job and then a 2nd full time job, working 80 plus hours per week.

- Age 23, Starting to get back into kink and to my normal self I knew that Madame Ingrid was a respected Domme and was in Pittsburgh. I contact her and had a 1 hour session with her. I paid $300 for the hour. I had a great experience and was back within the same week and had another 1 hour session for $300. She knew who I was through some friends and over the next few months we built a friendship.

- Age 23, Lexi Sindel contacted me as she knew I was in Ohio. She let me know of some filming going on in Columbus as Club Dom was in town. The next day I shot with them. Soon after I was in D.C. shooting with Lexi Sindel.

- Age 23 turning 24. I began to put myself out there as a fetish model. People had known of me from Chicago and the traveling I was doing. I started doing trade for content work as well as accepting paid gigs.

-----------------------

- I'm now 25 and graduating college this summer. I have my blog and I have my own clips4sale store that I'm continuing to build - AEB Femdom.

I'll be in Chicago this summer - 2012 with an internship and then moving to Phoenix, Arizona for a few years with a job offer. My life in kink as a submissive will continue to grow and evolve. My life is my life. Other male submissive's can do what pleases them, but don't limit yourself and think that you can't find someone to serve. Or that you can't be involved in the community.

I am proud of what I've accomplished in Kink. I'm proud that I've made a name that people recognize, respect and get off to. I'm proud of the people I've gotten to explore my kinks with and I look forward to all that comes. I mean shit, I am only 25.

Here's a list of all the people I can recall working with over the past 9 plus years.

- Lexi Sindel - Madame Ingrid- VonLivid - Maya Sinstress - Nyssa Nevers - Jade Indica - Lochai - Miss Jaded - Xena - Miss Cheyenne Nikki Domino - Miss Jaded - Miss Simone - Miss Whip - Alexandra Sadista - Natalya Sadici - Dvnt - Miss Mina Meow - Corral Korrupt - Ginger Stone - Gia - Maria Purple Goddess - Lady O - Victoria Sapphire - Noel Knight - Miss Jenni Fishnets - House of Bias Latex - Haven - Kelle Martina - Jessica Temptress - Manchester & I know there's more but I don't remember everyone.

SB Kink & Relocation

Spring Break is almost over and it's back to school for Spring Quarter on Monday, March 26th. I've received lots of news over the past few weeks some great and some not so good. As for school, last quarter I earned over a 3.0 GPA again. I'm much better at college than I was at high school that's for sure. I've had the past week off for break and then it's back to school Monday for my final full quarter here at Ohio University. I have to take 12 credits over the summer for a few weeks but that's nothing.
I've been working out a lot over break and while working out I started talking with this guy. I've never met him and he mentioned someone being kinky. Before you knew it we were talking about kink, Fetlife, me and more.... what a strange conversation it was and what a small world it is.

The other night I was being true to my name - Autoeroticboy. I came up with a solo 3-some rigging to fuck myself and suck off another dildo at the same time to eventually masturbate as well. It was hot and worked out really well. Here are a few pictures of the rigging that involved flipping over my chair.

A few nights before that I decided to wear some diapers and be a feminine youngster as I went to bed. So here are a few pictures of that along with my new Ohio University PJ shorts. Thought I'd show some school spirit.

On to some of the news:

Monday I had to go back to the doctor to get my test results in regards to some things that I can be at a higher risk of having Klinefelter's. I came back 100% healthy in general and for my test results on Anemia and Thyroid disorder.
I also had my sperm tested or should I say my lack of sperm tested.... They didn't find any sperm At All! So that means I can't have kids or there is a 0.000001% chance that I could have a kid. I'm not shocked by that, it's actually what I expected. With that said, it's strange having that privilege taken away from you. I've come to terms with it and to be honest I've always said I don't want kids. If I ever change my mind I've always been supportive of adopting children. But, it's official that I can't produce my own.

On some really good news........ I got a job offer!
Not only did I get a job offer, I got a job offer 6 months before I graduate. That's a fucking accomplishment. I've been interviewing with the company since October. I've thought things over and I'm going to accept the position as it's a great opportunity for me. I'll be starting the position in September and relocating...... to where you ask?

- ARIZONA!
I'll be living and working in the Phoenix area. I've never been to Arizona, I don't know much about Phoenix other than some of the research I've done. I know 1 person there from childhood but haven't seen him since 5th grade, although we've spoken a bit lately. I'm not sure how the kink community is there, I don't know the neighborhoods.... nothing!
But I've got some time to learn. I don't have plans to live in Phoenix my whole life but I do expect to be there 2-3 years.

If anyone reads this blog and lives in Arizona and or knows Arizona, the Phoenix area at all, all help/assistance is appreciated. Over the next several months as I learn more and figure out when I'll be moving there etc. I will update it here.

When Things Get Wild

This past Thursday my apartment complex through a pool party. One of their salesman also happens to be one of the 2 big DJ's in town. They also had other DJ's on, games and of course lots of students drinking. It went from 4pm to midnight and I got there about 6. Luckily we got some nice weather. Bobcat and his girl went with me and the party was open to the public. I bought an 18 pack thinking that would last us all night, I was wrong. We drank that in 2 hours. But when your having fun in the pool and winning at Bags you drink rather quickly.

So we went to get more and this time got a 24 pack. I lost track of how much we drank at this point. A little after 11 we started to head out. As I'm standing by the pool about to leave this girl is looking at me and just bluntly says, "your cute!" Then her man starts asking me questions about my tats so I told him a little bit. He proceeds to ask about the tattoo on my left ribs, the ballgag portrait. I laughed and said it's a person ballgagged. He's like are you into that stuff and I'm like obviously, I got a big tattoo of it. I'm drunk and some how I said I do kinky films. They're reaction surprised me. They were happy and he asked if I wanted to fuck his girl. I'm like seriously and she's like Ya!

So we exchange numbers, I get back to my apt and they contact me. 10 minutes later they are over at my place. He was a good looking guy but she was smoking hot!!!! I did warn them that I was very intoxicated and I wasn't too sure my friend below was going to cooperate to me. But, luckily I had toys and Bobcat and his girl joined in for a bit.

Starting this school year I never thought I would have 2 separate 5-some orgies with completely different people in 1 school year. We went at it for a good 2 hours, all positions and that girl even took my big 9 inch and thick dildos like nothing. Although, I do understand that your muscles loosen when your drinking. I could tell it was a bit awkward for them when they were heading out as they had never done that before. But, neither got jealous and overall it was fun.

At the same time I am way too kinky for normal sex with just more people added to the mix. I mean if we just added some gags, spanking, strap-ons, etc I would be much happier. The 1st orgy I had earlier in the school year was definitely kinkier but still not up to my level. In fact, I would probably get off more being put in bondage in the corner, being put in chastity and not allowed to participate. Or if someone wanted me to participate we would definitely have to add some toys, humiliation, and rough physical sex to even come close to my standards. Oh well, maybe my senior year will bring me kinkier people.

Saturday I ran a 5K for Cystic Fibrosis. I wanted to run it in under 30minutes and I was definitely on pace to do so but the last mile killed me. I ran it in 31:32 which I'm fine with. I ran a couple miles a few days before the race on the treadmill to be somewhat prepared but I'm proud I even ran that much. We were also go up more hills than down which makes it even more difficult. I did beat out my roommate by just over 30 seconds when he seriously wanted to run it in under 22 minutes. I told him he must of been crazy. His girlfriend beat us both by coming in just under 30 minutes.
I'm definitely going to run more in the future.

There are 3 weeks left of school. I've got a lot of work to do but things are going well. Andriana Santos and I are working on our few week work trip together. School ends June 9th for me and then I'll be in town for the weekend because of a burn that Bobcat helps put on, Scorched Nuts. Then around the 13th Andriana and I are looking at making an east coast trip with cities like Pittsburgh, DC/Baltimore, Philly, NYC, Boston, Rhode Island, & Toronto. Then I would be in Chicago around the end of June/early July.

I will be taking sessions a TG Domme & be doing video as myself. My schedule is filling up rather quickly and specific dates will be released within the next few weeks, definitely by the end of this month.