I've been on hiatus with my blog and many other aspects of my life that is in the public eye. I've pulled off of Fetlife, Twitter, my blog, and my attendance at kink events of any kind except for my attendance at Domcon LA and I also went to Folsom Street in San Francisco earlier in my hiatus. The reason for this is I've been going through a lot of personal change. With that said, I've decided to start opening myself up to the you guys once again as I do find it very therapeutic and enjoy hearing how I help others out as well.
What I would like to do is share a part of myself with you that I haven't talked much about. I mentioned that I'm transitioning to live as female. I've mentioned that I was born XXY (Intersex) called Klinefelter's Syndrome. I've clearly mentioned how kinky I am and shared my kinky life with you for years. But I haven't shared my struggles in finding my own gender identity, I haven't shared my path to how I got to where I am today, I haven't shared the ups and downs I've gone through in coming out to my friends, family, colleagues and others in my life.
So I'm going to share that all with you through text, images and videos.
I will also share more of my kink lifestyle with you as I did before. Many ask both me and Mistress Tangent on a regular basis and to address that question, yes we are still happily together. Once again I simply pulled back on sharing due to the massive changes I've been experiencing.
Right now I'm in Chicago, I've been here as of early July until July 25th. I'm here to do with family issues around my transition. I will have another post for you in a few days with many more details after I finishing announcing my transition publicly.
Thank you for all of your patience. My blog and my writings have always been very helpful to me and I love the interaction and feedback that it brings me from all of you.
Showing posts with label Mistress Tangent. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mistress Tangent. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 13, 2016
Wednesday, July 8, 2015
Stripped & Naked
Stripped and naked.
Not physically but of my collar for further training.
Over all these years in kink and all the time I've been around lifestyle people and lived the lifestyle myself I've never been trained in high protocal. I've never been a "slave" the way Mistress Tangent desires me as a slave. The truth is, when I look inside myself I've never been a "slave" the way I've desired either. My own fears, anxiety, and pride has kept myself from letting go to the point where I can be a slave.
Not just for the name of being a slave and not just for a short period of time like a session but for good. To dedicate myself to someone forever.
This all came to over a period of time and with our most recent trip to San Diego where we spent some time around some high protocal friends and I failed to present myself and show that same level of respect for Mistress Tangent in particular situations.
I've decided to dedicate myself to the teachings and learnings of Mistress Tangent so that I will be the proper slave She deserves and our relationship will continue to blossum and grow into what we both desire. My level of trust, belief, and love in Her and Her geniune love of power exchange and BDSM has brought me to where I am today. Stripped, Naked, Collar-less to learn the real, proper ways of Femdom and to serve Her to the highest degree.
This stripping began just last night. The first hour of training and the foundation to us.
The 2 most difficult parts for the both of us was Her removing 2 privledges that were given to me. 1) She removed my collar and I am forbidden to wear anything even resembling a collar until I have earned it. 2) I am no longer allowed to call Her (Daddy) as I have been for a long time now. The only time this is allowed is when She is fucking me and when I earn my collar back. I cried over both these situations while in my high protocal slave position.
Mistress Tangent then taught me the basic rules of the 3 protocals (low, medium & high) and the rules along with them.
Low: Is when we are around family and friends and or public situations and I am to maintain a level of respect throughout. Further details will be revealed in our next training.
Medium: When we are at home and also at fetish parties/events.
High: When we are with others who live the D/s lifestyle and in some other situations that Mistress Tangent deems necessary. High protocal is also ALWAYS in place for punishments.
So far I've been taught a couple slave positions and protocals that follow the high protocal.
Attention: Standing with arms by side and hands open/facing out.
Listening: Standing or sitting in slave form with my hands open/together low near waist shows that I'm listening.
Question: Standing or sitting in slave form with my hands open/together but raised to my chest, waiting to be allowed to ask a question or to speak.
During high protocal I am not allowed to speak unless spoken to.
During high and medium protocal I am to address Her at all times properly. Because the word (Daddy) has been stripped from me until I'm allowed the privledge of using that word again I now must address her as Ma'am AT ALL TIMES when in Medium or High protocal.
Just over 1 day into training I can feel the positive tension. I am committed to being a slave that my Owner is proud of. I am committed to treating Her the way She deserves to be treated. I am committed to myself throughout this process and I am stripped and naked to be molded.
Additionally, I've been locked up in chastity for 42 straight days now and this time I'm locked up in the smallest possible Cb-6000 cage possible. The length is about 2 inches and I didn't think I could fit into it but the truth is this size fits me much better. I feel more frustration in this sized cage and with me being on HRT now since February it only makes sense. I am not allowed any orgasms until I've taken 10,000, that's right 10,000 canings from Mistress Tangent. 42 days in and I'm at a little over 1,000 canings.
I want to leave off on this note. 1 full day of proper protocal to my Owner has brought a new hightened sense of eroticism, arosal and tingles to my body. Both sexually and mentally stimulating. I'm very excited about Our journey down this road together.
Not physically but of my collar for further training.
Over all these years in kink and all the time I've been around lifestyle people and lived the lifestyle myself I've never been trained in high protocal. I've never been a "slave" the way Mistress Tangent desires me as a slave. The truth is, when I look inside myself I've never been a "slave" the way I've desired either. My own fears, anxiety, and pride has kept myself from letting go to the point where I can be a slave.
Not just for the name of being a slave and not just for a short period of time like a session but for good. To dedicate myself to someone forever.
This all came to over a period of time and with our most recent trip to San Diego where we spent some time around some high protocal friends and I failed to present myself and show that same level of respect for Mistress Tangent in particular situations.
I've decided to dedicate myself to the teachings and learnings of Mistress Tangent so that I will be the proper slave She deserves and our relationship will continue to blossum and grow into what we both desire. My level of trust, belief, and love in Her and Her geniune love of power exchange and BDSM has brought me to where I am today. Stripped, Naked, Collar-less to learn the real, proper ways of Femdom and to serve Her to the highest degree.
This stripping began just last night. The first hour of training and the foundation to us.
The 2 most difficult parts for the both of us was Her removing 2 privledges that were given to me. 1) She removed my collar and I am forbidden to wear anything even resembling a collar until I have earned it. 2) I am no longer allowed to call Her (Daddy) as I have been for a long time now. The only time this is allowed is when She is fucking me and when I earn my collar back. I cried over both these situations while in my high protocal slave position.
Mistress Tangent then taught me the basic rules of the 3 protocals (low, medium & high) and the rules along with them.
Low: Is when we are around family and friends and or public situations and I am to maintain a level of respect throughout. Further details will be revealed in our next training.
Medium: When we are at home and also at fetish parties/events.
High: When we are with others who live the D/s lifestyle and in some other situations that Mistress Tangent deems necessary. High protocal is also ALWAYS in place for punishments.
So far I've been taught a couple slave positions and protocals that follow the high protocal.
Attention: Standing with arms by side and hands open/facing out.
Listening: Standing or sitting in slave form with my hands open/together low near waist shows that I'm listening.
Question: Standing or sitting in slave form with my hands open/together but raised to my chest, waiting to be allowed to ask a question or to speak.
During high protocal I am not allowed to speak unless spoken to.
During high and medium protocal I am to address Her at all times properly. Because the word (Daddy) has been stripped from me until I'm allowed the privledge of using that word again I now must address her as Ma'am AT ALL TIMES when in Medium or High protocal.
Just over 1 day into training I can feel the positive tension. I am committed to being a slave that my Owner is proud of. I am committed to treating Her the way She deserves to be treated. I am committed to myself throughout this process and I am stripped and naked to be molded.
Additionally, I've been locked up in chastity for 42 straight days now and this time I'm locked up in the smallest possible Cb-6000 cage possible. The length is about 2 inches and I didn't think I could fit into it but the truth is this size fits me much better. I feel more frustration in this sized cage and with me being on HRT now since February it only makes sense. I am not allowed any orgasms until I've taken 10,000, that's right 10,000 canings from Mistress Tangent. 42 days in and I'm at a little over 1,000 canings.
I want to leave off on this note. 1 full day of proper protocal to my Owner has brought a new hightened sense of eroticism, arosal and tingles to my body. Both sexually and mentally stimulating. I'm very excited about Our journey down this road together.
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
Day 1 of Cadence Kline
I've wrote it. I've talked about it. I've shared it. And now it's begun.....
I've officially started taking ESTROGEN.
In fact... I'm on day 2.
And so it begins..... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOuBlfGXL0M&feature=youtu.be
Day 1 of Cadence Kline
The truth is, I don't know how far I'm going to take it. But what I do know is that I'm in a good place and that I must find out. I've decided to not only document it here in writing and in photos but to document in through my new Youtube channel. Video 1 was just uploaded.
The 1st 10 weeks I'm only taking 1 mg/day of Estradiol. From there we will make the necessary changes but we wanted to start slow and due to my low testosterone this is the proper way to start. I want to note, that I am doing all of this through an endocrinologist in Arizona who is very well versed on the topic.
Yes, Mistress Tangent is for this, but the truth is to all you perverts out there is that She is supportive of what ever I choose. Anyone that's known me for a long time knows that this is NOT just a phase. In fact, it's something I've put off/suppressed for a very long time. At worst, taking estrogen will have positive effects on my overall health like Osteoporosis, and having more energy.
Being born intersex, XXY and by definition with Klinefelter's Syndrome by body and mind are alfready 3/4 female. With the lack of research out there and with my years of studying on the topic I felt documenting my experience, thoughts and process wasn't an option.
Subscribe to my Youtube channel and share anywhere you would like. More than anything, I'm sharing my experience of being intersex, XXY, Klinefelter's and some might say transgender with others to help, educate and enlighten.
I've officially started taking ESTROGEN.
In fact... I'm on day 2.
And so it begins..... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOuBlfGXL0M&feature=youtu.be
Day 1 of Cadence Kline
The truth is, I don't know how far I'm going to take it. But what I do know is that I'm in a good place and that I must find out. I've decided to not only document it here in writing and in photos but to document in through my new Youtube channel. Video 1 was just uploaded.
The 1st 10 weeks I'm only taking 1 mg/day of Estradiol. From there we will make the necessary changes but we wanted to start slow and due to my low testosterone this is the proper way to start. I want to note, that I am doing all of this through an endocrinologist in Arizona who is very well versed on the topic.
Yes, Mistress Tangent is for this, but the truth is to all you perverts out there is that She is supportive of what ever I choose. Anyone that's known me for a long time knows that this is NOT just a phase. In fact, it's something I've put off/suppressed for a very long time. At worst, taking estrogen will have positive effects on my overall health like Osteoporosis, and having more energy.
Being born intersex, XXY and by definition with Klinefelter's Syndrome by body and mind are alfready 3/4 female. With the lack of research out there and with my years of studying on the topic I felt documenting my experience, thoughts and process wasn't an option.
Subscribe to my Youtube channel and share anywhere you would like. More than anything, I'm sharing my experience of being intersex, XXY, Klinefelter's and some might say transgender with others to help, educate and enlighten.
Monday, January 5, 2015
Happy New Year - Orgasm's to Cum?
Happy New Year!
New Year, same ol chastity for me. I've been locked in chastity since July 17, 2014 and this morning marks 101 days without an orgasm. Originally I was supposed to be released on Christmas Eve but I know that I have to go through the ringer prior to being released. With Her traveling in December and then the Holidays we just didn't have time. Then we spent New Years Eve in Chicago together with my hometown friends and enjoyed a lovely welcoming of the New Year by taking my first ass fucking in nearly 100 days.
Of course we were a little intoxicated being that it was NYE and we didn't have any lube with us. But, we weren't going to let that stop us. A little spit from me and Her and a little bit of my blood from the rough oral I was giving Her cock prior and in She went. She fucked me so hard, so good in our little bedroom (closet) to make sure we had some private space. She fucked me right up until I was about to cum and stopped.
She will be back home in Phoenix with me in a few days and Wednesday I'll be getting my first real marking from Her. I'm very excited about this. She is piercing both of my nipples!!!
I will wear them proudly and look forward to more permanent markings from Her in the future as we grow.
After the piercings I get more of Daddy's dick and rule #1 for me to reach orgasm with the Hitachi in the future is to achieve an anal orgasm while She fucks me. Then, will come further steps (hopefully I get to achieve/pass these steps sooner than later) and then I will be able to cum for the first time in over 3 1/2
months.
I will say, when I have not cum in such long periods of time. I am a lot more pron to do dirty things, I also start to think about and fantasize about such things.
With that said, I've come to truly want to be in chastity. I feel it serves a better purpose locked up than not locked up. I feel more comfortable with it locked up. I feel more feminine with it locked up. Truth is I don't use it, don't need it, in that capacity. Orgasms I of course desire, but that is it.
My CB-6000 (new one) since I broke the last one. Has held up very well, but I believe that's because my body has begun to adjust after spending over 9 months of 2014 in chastity. With that said, I do look forward to upgrading to another chastity belt in time.
New Year, same ol chastity for me. I've been locked in chastity since July 17, 2014 and this morning marks 101 days without an orgasm. Originally I was supposed to be released on Christmas Eve but I know that I have to go through the ringer prior to being released. With Her traveling in December and then the Holidays we just didn't have time. Then we spent New Years Eve in Chicago together with my hometown friends and enjoyed a lovely welcoming of the New Year by taking my first ass fucking in nearly 100 days.
Of course we were a little intoxicated being that it was NYE and we didn't have any lube with us. But, we weren't going to let that stop us. A little spit from me and Her and a little bit of my blood from the rough oral I was giving Her cock prior and in She went. She fucked me so hard, so good in our little bedroom (closet) to make sure we had some private space. She fucked me right up until I was about to cum and stopped.
She will be back home in Phoenix with me in a few days and Wednesday I'll be getting my first real marking from Her. I'm very excited about this. She is piercing both of my nipples!!!
I will wear them proudly and look forward to more permanent markings from Her in the future as we grow.
After the piercings I get more of Daddy's dick and rule #1 for me to reach orgasm with the Hitachi in the future is to achieve an anal orgasm while She fucks me. Then, will come further steps (hopefully I get to achieve/pass these steps sooner than later) and then I will be able to cum for the first time in over 3 1/2
months.
I will say, when I have not cum in such long periods of time. I am a lot more pron to do dirty things, I also start to think about and fantasize about such things.
With that said, I've come to truly want to be in chastity. I feel it serves a better purpose locked up than not locked up. I feel more comfortable with it locked up. I feel more feminine with it locked up. Truth is I don't use it, don't need it, in that capacity. Orgasms I of course desire, but that is it.
My CB-6000 (new one) since I broke the last one. Has held up very well, but I believe that's because my body has begun to adjust after spending over 9 months of 2014 in chastity. With that said, I do look forward to upgrading to another chastity belt in time.
Thursday, October 30, 2014
Pony Up
Been away and have lots to share. I'll break it up into different posts for an easier read.
We'll start with Ponies.
Pony play has been a very long desire of mine and it's one that I've never experienced. I'm not someone who is highly into role-play as a whole but there is something about pony play that captures me. Pony play can be a rather expensive form of bdsm but we've slowly (Mistress Tangent & I) have begun taking steps to make this more of a reality.
There are 2 separate aspects to our pony play.
1) I'm the pony and She is the trainer
2) I'm the pony and She is the War Horse who ultimately fucks me with Her big horse cock.
------
1) Researching pony gear
2) Made a few purchases. We both got a leather chest harness that is versatile in general but works as a good early harness. We also got an awesome glittered big gag from Domina Angelina out of San Diego.
I was asked what kind of real pony I identify with. What similarities do I believe I have with this style of pony and what traits do I wish to aspire to have.
I chose the Palomino horse (Golden Siberian)
Traits include:
- Beauty
- Versatility
- Endurance
- They have also been around for centuries which means they are persistent and my Owner knows that I am persistent.
Additionally, I see myself as a show pony, fetish pony, and a cart pony. That's another reason why I chose the style of pony that I did with the versatility.
Here are some photos of the Palomino Pony...
I am excited with the little steps we've taken and in time we will be rubber and leather ponies roaming fields from me spending a few days living out of stables and as a pony 24/7 all while being properly trained to my Owners expectations.
We'll start with Ponies.
Pony play has been a very long desire of mine and it's one that I've never experienced. I'm not someone who is highly into role-play as a whole but there is something about pony play that captures me. Pony play can be a rather expensive form of bdsm but we've slowly (Mistress Tangent & I) have begun taking steps to make this more of a reality.
There are 2 separate aspects to our pony play.
1) I'm the pony and She is the trainer
2) I'm the pony and She is the War Horse who ultimately fucks me with Her big horse cock.
------
1) Researching pony gear
2) Made a few purchases. We both got a leather chest harness that is versatile in general but works as a good early harness. We also got an awesome glittered big gag from Domina Angelina out of San Diego.
I chose the Palomino horse (Golden Siberian)
Traits include:
- Beauty
- Versatility
- Endurance
- They have also been around for centuries which means they are persistent and my Owner knows that I am persistent.
Additionally, I see myself as a show pony, fetish pony, and a cart pony. That's another reason why I chose the style of pony that I did with the versatility.
Here are some photos of the Palomino Pony...
I am excited with the little steps we've taken and in time we will be rubber and leather ponies roaming fields from me spending a few days living out of stables and as a pony 24/7 all while being properly trained to my Owners expectations.Sunday, August 24, 2014
Needles
For those of you keeping track, today is day 38 in chastity of 160.
I have had 2 orgasms while in the cage while being fucked along with the Hitachi. Both were magical orgasms with Her dick inside me. I know that I'm always being prepped to take chastity longer and longer. Learning to cum in chastity in one way is great for me and the other means that She can keep me locked up for longer periods of time.
One of the new rules implemented in this 160 days of chastity is needles. The CB-6000 can be a pain in the ass to clean. Every night by 9pm I must have my cage thoroughly cleaned and smelling like perfection. 1 needle if not cleaned and 1 needle if not smelling right.
Did I mention that I HATE needles!?!
In fact, other than my ears pierced, my Prince Albert and the taint piercing I used to have I've never done any other piercings and that includes play piercings. The first time I failed at this She stuck a couple 20 gauge needles through my ball sack. I was developing cold sweats and was scared to death. They really hurt but what was to come about a week later was much worse.
This time I was warned that She was using larger needles. 7 of them this time and by larger, she jumped up to 14 gauges. Sweating and yelling I was helpless as my body was tied down on the bed like an 'X'. Lying down and not being able to see helps me out at least a little bit.
Then I messed up again and I was due 4 needles over the next week or so. But then I decided to bet Daddy double or nothing regarding some stupid vacuum bet that I pretty much knew I had no chance or winning. Of course, I lost and now owned Her 8 needles.
This time I was caught off guard. We tried to do the 8 needles the 2 nights prior but life got in the way and we were too busy. If punishment is delayed longer than 3 days regarding the needles then I sleep on the floor next to the bed chained up. So that's where I slept, and that's not where I wanted to be sleeping. The 3rd night She got home late and I wasn't expecting Her to have the energy for the needles, but She did.
She caught me by surprise and pulled up a chair into the bathroom and told me to sit. Tied my legs wide open and my arms up and behind me. Bound tied with my cock pulled up to my collar so that She would have a good canvas to pierce me with. I started to get my cold sweats as I got more nervous. As She got closer to piercing me I would start to hyper-ventilate a little bit. I caught my breath, said ready and in goes 1 as I scream in pain.
I counted each one in my head knowing how many I had left. She took it slow due to my un-easy stomach making sure I was ready for the next needle every time but it just seemed to get more and more painful. The unexpectedness of the ordeal also through off my mindset and made it more difficult.
By the end, I was spent, exhausted, hurting and my legs wouldn't stop shaking.
I'm learning to keep my cage clean but I know that She also likes to catch me when She can. The sadist in Her comes out when given the opportunity. Besides that, I've recently been hearing Her say that She is going to push me past all of my, "original" hard limits. One by one as I'm molded into Her slave.
It's 8:30pm now. I have to run and clean my cage. Day 38 of chastity and I'm starting to throb in my cage a lot more continuously. Time to clean before I get more needles. Pics are below.
I have had 2 orgasms while in the cage while being fucked along with the Hitachi. Both were magical orgasms with Her dick inside me. I know that I'm always being prepped to take chastity longer and longer. Learning to cum in chastity in one way is great for me and the other means that She can keep me locked up for longer periods of time.
One of the new rules implemented in this 160 days of chastity is needles. The CB-6000 can be a pain in the ass to clean. Every night by 9pm I must have my cage thoroughly cleaned and smelling like perfection. 1 needle if not cleaned and 1 needle if not smelling right.
Did I mention that I HATE needles!?!
In fact, other than my ears pierced, my Prince Albert and the taint piercing I used to have I've never done any other piercings and that includes play piercings. The first time I failed at this She stuck a couple 20 gauge needles through my ball sack. I was developing cold sweats and was scared to death. They really hurt but what was to come about a week later was much worse.
This time I was warned that She was using larger needles. 7 of them this time and by larger, she jumped up to 14 gauges. Sweating and yelling I was helpless as my body was tied down on the bed like an 'X'. Lying down and not being able to see helps me out at least a little bit.
Then I messed up again and I was due 4 needles over the next week or so. But then I decided to bet Daddy double or nothing regarding some stupid vacuum bet that I pretty much knew I had no chance or winning. Of course, I lost and now owned Her 8 needles.
This time I was caught off guard. We tried to do the 8 needles the 2 nights prior but life got in the way and we were too busy. If punishment is delayed longer than 3 days regarding the needles then I sleep on the floor next to the bed chained up. So that's where I slept, and that's not where I wanted to be sleeping. The 3rd night She got home late and I wasn't expecting Her to have the energy for the needles, but She did.
She caught me by surprise and pulled up a chair into the bathroom and told me to sit. Tied my legs wide open and my arms up and behind me. Bound tied with my cock pulled up to my collar so that She would have a good canvas to pierce me with. I started to get my cold sweats as I got more nervous. As She got closer to piercing me I would start to hyper-ventilate a little bit. I caught my breath, said ready and in goes 1 as I scream in pain.
I counted each one in my head knowing how many I had left. She took it slow due to my un-easy stomach making sure I was ready for the next needle every time but it just seemed to get more and more painful. The unexpectedness of the ordeal also through off my mindset and made it more difficult.
By the end, I was spent, exhausted, hurting and my legs wouldn't stop shaking.
I'm learning to keep my cage clean but I know that She also likes to catch me when She can. The sadist in Her comes out when given the opportunity. Besides that, I've recently been hearing Her say that She is going to push me past all of my, "original" hard limits. One by one as I'm molded into Her slave.
It's 8:30pm now. I have to run and clean my cage. Day 38 of chastity and I'm starting to throb in my cage a lot more continuously. Time to clean before I get more needles. Pics are below.
Saturday, July 19, 2014
Indulge
Last Friday we were supposed to go to a Fetish party but it ended at midnight which is rather early. By the time I got off work and got all dolled up it was too late so we decided to have some fun at home.
We've been trying to figure out my hair for awhile now with my extensions after I cut my long hair off. I wanted to do the alt girl look with a shaved side of the head. And I love the look we got with it.
The makeup, we tried something new and again it came out perfect. I think this is going to be my new look for awhile.
The dress of the night, is a stretchy blue dress that is Tangent's. I've lost so much weight over the past 7 months I fit into smaller sizes and it's terrific. I've lost about 25 pounds since December 2013 and my feminine figure shows tenfold now.
A side note, I'm back in chastity as of 2 days ago.
Indulge
We've been trying to figure out my hair for awhile now with my extensions after I cut my long hair off. I wanted to do the alt girl look with a shaved side of the head. And I love the look we got with it.
The makeup, we tried something new and again it came out perfect. I think this is going to be my new look for awhile.
The dress of the night, is a stretchy blue dress that is Tangent's. I've lost so much weight over the past 7 months I fit into smaller sizes and it's terrific. I've lost about 25 pounds since December 2013 and my feminine figure shows tenfold now.
A side note, I'm back in chastity as of 2 days ago.
Indulge
Monday, June 2, 2014
Day 65: Day of Hell - Tortured to Earn Orgasm
The morning of day 65 I went to work. It was just like any other morning except that I knew what day 65 was... It was my last day in chastity prior to being released but it was also a day of "hell" as in She was going to do anything She felt like doing to me.
Ironically enough, I couldn't wait for the work day to end and for me to get home. I was told to grab a bite to eat and then it was to begin.
About 7pm I was told I have 20 minutes to do all my makeup. 20 minutes!!! In my head I was thinking I'm only going to be half done with 20 minutes. But, I kicked it in gear and got my makeup done while She packed a bunch of goodies into the kink bag. I didn't even think to look at what She was packing although I really didn't want to know either. I knew that we were leaving the house but I wasn't sure where we were going. She was clad in one of Her new corsets and sexy, black Domme attire so I figured we were either going to the dungeon or someone's house.
We arrive at the dungeon and I'm escorted into a red room and told to put on black stockings, garter belt, crotchless black panties, black bra and my new black heels (which She by the way made me try on at the store a few days prior). I got all dressed up and then just waited and waited which seemed like an eternity because I knew that bad things were about to happen to me and I was waiting in anxiety and anxiousness. Then She walks in, puts a collar around my neck, attaches a leash and tugs at it while She walks me out of the room. No words, just a look, a glare and I followed.
Through one room and into another and there's a hooded person with a camera. Yes, all of this was captured on video. I didn't know who that person was though. I walked into a corner and was put on my knees facing out looking into the room. I look at Her and then that's when I noticed out the corner of my eye there were 2 more men to the left of the room. I knew what was to come next... but first She had me announce to them the situation.
"How long have you been in chastity?"
Me: 65 days
"Tell Me, what do you have to do for Me to earn release from chastity on day 66?"
Me: Anything You want Daddy.
And so it began. The 2 men walk over to me. She says, "The dicks aren't going to pull themselves out". So I nervously start to un-button their pants. Dicks flop out, condoms are put on and I start sucking one of them. But I didn't think to pay attention to the other dick but She pointed that out quickly so I'd be sucking on one and stroking the other. One dick was rather big while the other wasn't. I got both of them hard rather quickly and I then I was left alone to suck their cocks for maybe a minute or so but soon after my head was being forced down both of their cocks as She grabbed me by my hair and started shoving my face down their cocks.
I was drooling, gagging, tears running down my face, snot bubbling out my nose but I was still sucking and jerking and then one of the men yell out, "I'm going to cum" and he shoots his load all over my face. Soon as he is done cuming I'm directed back onto the large cock and bobbing my head on his cock. I was running out of breath as She was slamming my throat down on his cock to their point where I was deep throating him over and over. It had to be another 1-2 minutes until he cumed all over my face as well.
I was a hot mess, literally. Couldn't open one of my eyes due to all the cum in it, cum in my hair that was stuck to my face, cum up my nose and on my lips. Lipstick smeared on my face, tears had run down my face and my eye makeup was smeared all over as well. I was literally left there on the floor with my real consciousness of what was going on. I was just used and abused by 2 men for my owner as they were escorted out. Then I'm picked up by my hair and essentially dragged out as I teeter on my heels to the red room that I started in.
She says, "Don't touch your face but change clothes, the night just started".
Fast forward as we get home...
She straps on Her dick and shoves it down my throat. Get it straight, I suck Her cock all the time and it was only right that I sucked Her dick as well. But this wasn't no 'gentle' cock sucking. She wanted to ravage my throat the way the 2 men did, if not harder. Immediately, I deep throat her 8 inch thick cock and time and time again she shoves it back down, balls deep on her cock with each time being a harder thrust. Within seconds, blood is coming out of my mouth and my blood is covering her cock. She throat fucked me so hard I cut open my throat on Her cock. We both noticed it, but that didn't matter....
"Lick your blood off my cock", She said. And then I would have my throat fucked again. She orders me off Her cock after I clean up all my blood off of it and orders me into the bathroom. I'm on my knees and in She comes with the open mouth, dental gag. She forces my mouth wide open and has my head back. She pisses her warm piss into a glass right in front of me and I know what is next.
(( I have difficulty drinking piss because I have a very bad gag reflux so as many love such a gesture, She knows that this is a form of torture and humiliation for me))
With no hesitation she starts pouring Her piss from the glass down my wide open throat. It fills up my entire mouth and then starts to overflow out of my mouth as the reminder trickles down my throat and I soon begin to gag. As I gag I choke on Her piss and swallow more. I'm struggling and weak and as soon as there is more room in my mouth to take more She pours the rest into my mouth. I choke, gag, moan, struggle and even start to puke a bit, but I know even that would be forced back down my throat.
I'm left on the floor just a complete mess, used, abused, tired, sore, degraded but She wasn't done with me. I'm ordered to sit on the floor with my legs outwards and She tells me that I've earned release from the Chastity cage that I've been in for 65 days. Out come the keys and piece by piece She removes my cage. My cock is throbbing and I'm excited but I'm also beat, mentally, emotionally, and physically. She turns on the Hitachi and laughs as She talked about how quickly She expects me to cum. She puts the Hitachi on my cock and it took maybe 10 seconds max, I ask for permission to cum but She says no, not yet.
What!!!!! (I'm thinking in my head, She keeps the Hitachi on my cock the entire time, I can't hold it any longer and I start cuming everywhere and then She punches my cock really hard. I twist to turn away as I moan in ecstasy and pain and She punches my cock again and again and again. What a ruined orgasm that was and then all the cum of my big load was dripped and rubbed into my mouth.
And that's when She cuts the camera but not because She was down with me but because what was done next is not allowed on film.
Her and I have a bucket list of things we want to do together. Full toilet has been on their awhile but once again, my gag reflux is really bad. Still bound from before I'm told to get on my knees with them spread. I think it my head ok, maybe She's not doing full toilet.... in turned out just not yet. She get's after my nipples with very strong clamps. (I have sensitive nipples) The combination of the entire night and then Her abusing my nipples all the while I have a new open mouth gag that has a round, smaller hole and it couldn't be pushed out of my mouth by me even if I tried. I literally just began to cry and cry and cry as She abused my nipples. It was a hopeless cry, a tired cry, an then She stopped only to instruct me to lay on my back.
Keep in mind that I still have the open mouth gag on and as I lay on the floor She stands over me and laughs as She says, "Oh, you know what's next". She squats Her naked body over me and her ass directly above my mouth, and the open gag and shit's into my mouth.
She didn't shit a lot but She knows me and my gag reflux and it was enough. Now the real humiliation and degradation began. I tried to swallow but started to gag and I found it near impossible to swallow with the gag so She removed it and told me to swallow. I tried but kept failing to the point where I had it half down and then threw up. She put my face in the shit and my puke now on the ground. The torment and then the time challenge and threat was announced.
I was told that I have 10 seconds to eat and swallow the shit. If I don't swallow it then I'm going to be chained to the toilet in the shit and puke and not allowed to shower. I knew She wasn't joking either and I couldn't let that happen tonight. So I some how slurped my own puke and Her shit off the ground in a couple of bites and it came down to the wire. As She counted "2, 1". I yelled with all the I had left in me, "It's down, it's down, look in my mouth!"
And then it was over.... I didn't move for 5-10 minutes. I was spent in every way.
I mean the idea of having me orgasm and then torture me more was brilliant on Her end.
(BTW, this is my 100th post to my blog. I must say it's the perfect post for #100)
Pictures to come. We are in Chicago right now for a few more days.
The video will also be released on her website: Mistress Tangent
Ironically enough, I couldn't wait for the work day to end and for me to get home. I was told to grab a bite to eat and then it was to begin.
About 7pm I was told I have 20 minutes to do all my makeup. 20 minutes!!! In my head I was thinking I'm only going to be half done with 20 minutes. But, I kicked it in gear and got my makeup done while She packed a bunch of goodies into the kink bag. I didn't even think to look at what She was packing although I really didn't want to know either. I knew that we were leaving the house but I wasn't sure where we were going. She was clad in one of Her new corsets and sexy, black Domme attire so I figured we were either going to the dungeon or someone's house.
We arrive at the dungeon and I'm escorted into a red room and told to put on black stockings, garter belt, crotchless black panties, black bra and my new black heels (which She by the way made me try on at the store a few days prior). I got all dressed up and then just waited and waited which seemed like an eternity because I knew that bad things were about to happen to me and I was waiting in anxiety and anxiousness. Then She walks in, puts a collar around my neck, attaches a leash and tugs at it while She walks me out of the room. No words, just a look, a glare and I followed.
Through one room and into another and there's a hooded person with a camera. Yes, all of this was captured on video. I didn't know who that person was though. I walked into a corner and was put on my knees facing out looking into the room. I look at Her and then that's when I noticed out the corner of my eye there were 2 more men to the left of the room. I knew what was to come next... but first She had me announce to them the situation.
"How long have you been in chastity?"
Me: 65 days
"Tell Me, what do you have to do for Me to earn release from chastity on day 66?"
Me: Anything You want Daddy.
And so it began. The 2 men walk over to me. She says, "The dicks aren't going to pull themselves out". So I nervously start to un-button their pants. Dicks flop out, condoms are put on and I start sucking one of them. But I didn't think to pay attention to the other dick but She pointed that out quickly so I'd be sucking on one and stroking the other. One dick was rather big while the other wasn't. I got both of them hard rather quickly and I then I was left alone to suck their cocks for maybe a minute or so but soon after my head was being forced down both of their cocks as She grabbed me by my hair and started shoving my face down their cocks.
I was drooling, gagging, tears running down my face, snot bubbling out my nose but I was still sucking and jerking and then one of the men yell out, "I'm going to cum" and he shoots his load all over my face. Soon as he is done cuming I'm directed back onto the large cock and bobbing my head on his cock. I was running out of breath as She was slamming my throat down on his cock to their point where I was deep throating him over and over. It had to be another 1-2 minutes until he cumed all over my face as well.
I was a hot mess, literally. Couldn't open one of my eyes due to all the cum in it, cum in my hair that was stuck to my face, cum up my nose and on my lips. Lipstick smeared on my face, tears had run down my face and my eye makeup was smeared all over as well. I was literally left there on the floor with my real consciousness of what was going on. I was just used and abused by 2 men for my owner as they were escorted out. Then I'm picked up by my hair and essentially dragged out as I teeter on my heels to the red room that I started in.
She says, "Don't touch your face but change clothes, the night just started".
Fast forward as we get home...
She straps on Her dick and shoves it down my throat. Get it straight, I suck Her cock all the time and it was only right that I sucked Her dick as well. But this wasn't no 'gentle' cock sucking. She wanted to ravage my throat the way the 2 men did, if not harder. Immediately, I deep throat her 8 inch thick cock and time and time again she shoves it back down, balls deep on her cock with each time being a harder thrust. Within seconds, blood is coming out of my mouth and my blood is covering her cock. She throat fucked me so hard I cut open my throat on Her cock. We both noticed it, but that didn't matter....
"Lick your blood off my cock", She said. And then I would have my throat fucked again. She orders me off Her cock after I clean up all my blood off of it and orders me into the bathroom. I'm on my knees and in She comes with the open mouth, dental gag. She forces my mouth wide open and has my head back. She pisses her warm piss into a glass right in front of me and I know what is next.
(( I have difficulty drinking piss because I have a very bad gag reflux so as many love such a gesture, She knows that this is a form of torture and humiliation for me))
With no hesitation she starts pouring Her piss from the glass down my wide open throat. It fills up my entire mouth and then starts to overflow out of my mouth as the reminder trickles down my throat and I soon begin to gag. As I gag I choke on Her piss and swallow more. I'm struggling and weak and as soon as there is more room in my mouth to take more She pours the rest into my mouth. I choke, gag, moan, struggle and even start to puke a bit, but I know even that would be forced back down my throat.
I'm left on the floor just a complete mess, used, abused, tired, sore, degraded but She wasn't done with me. I'm ordered to sit on the floor with my legs outwards and She tells me that I've earned release from the Chastity cage that I've been in for 65 days. Out come the keys and piece by piece She removes my cage. My cock is throbbing and I'm excited but I'm also beat, mentally, emotionally, and physically. She turns on the Hitachi and laughs as She talked about how quickly She expects me to cum. She puts the Hitachi on my cock and it took maybe 10 seconds max, I ask for permission to cum but She says no, not yet.
What!!!!! (I'm thinking in my head, She keeps the Hitachi on my cock the entire time, I can't hold it any longer and I start cuming everywhere and then She punches my cock really hard. I twist to turn away as I moan in ecstasy and pain and She punches my cock again and again and again. What a ruined orgasm that was and then all the cum of my big load was dripped and rubbed into my mouth.
And that's when She cuts the camera but not because She was down with me but because what was done next is not allowed on film.
Her and I have a bucket list of things we want to do together. Full toilet has been on their awhile but once again, my gag reflux is really bad. Still bound from before I'm told to get on my knees with them spread. I think it my head ok, maybe She's not doing full toilet.... in turned out just not yet. She get's after my nipples with very strong clamps. (I have sensitive nipples) The combination of the entire night and then Her abusing my nipples all the while I have a new open mouth gag that has a round, smaller hole and it couldn't be pushed out of my mouth by me even if I tried. I literally just began to cry and cry and cry as She abused my nipples. It was a hopeless cry, a tired cry, an then She stopped only to instruct me to lay on my back.
Keep in mind that I still have the open mouth gag on and as I lay on the floor She stands over me and laughs as She says, "Oh, you know what's next". She squats Her naked body over me and her ass directly above my mouth, and the open gag and shit's into my mouth.
She didn't shit a lot but She knows me and my gag reflux and it was enough. Now the real humiliation and degradation began. I tried to swallow but started to gag and I found it near impossible to swallow with the gag so She removed it and told me to swallow. I tried but kept failing to the point where I had it half down and then threw up. She put my face in the shit and my puke now on the ground. The torment and then the time challenge and threat was announced.
I was told that I have 10 seconds to eat and swallow the shit. If I don't swallow it then I'm going to be chained to the toilet in the shit and puke and not allowed to shower. I knew She wasn't joking either and I couldn't let that happen tonight. So I some how slurped my own puke and Her shit off the ground in a couple of bites and it came down to the wire. As She counted "2, 1". I yelled with all the I had left in me, "It's down, it's down, look in my mouth!"
And then it was over.... I didn't move for 5-10 minutes. I was spent in every way.
I mean the idea of having me orgasm and then torture me more was brilliant on Her end.
(BTW, this is my 100th post to my blog. I must say it's the perfect post for #100)
Pictures to come. We are in Chicago right now for a few more days.
The video will also be released on her website: Mistress Tangent
Friday, May 2, 2014
Forced Sissy Blowjob to Completion
A night of Humiliation, Degradation, Shame, Embarrassment...
(To Clarify as some have asked. Daddy is a She, She is my owner. The 2 of us have adopted the roles of She is the Daddy and I am Her girl. So throughout my posts you may see me refer to Her as She and as Daddy)
While at work I got a phone call that once I got home I was going to be all dolled up for Daddy (Wednesday night).
She had gone out and gotten me a brand new wig (sometimes I put in hair extensions), got me some new breast forms among other things. She also brought back some of my things that I still had in my NYC apartment when she was in NYC last week. Some of those things included my pink sissy dress, so I decided to wear that. I thought the night was going to be just me and her, like it usually is but after I was all ready; makeup, hair, lingerie, high heels, locking wrist cuffs, locking heel cuffs, my collar and locked in my dress I was told that our guest would be here soon.
I was told to pull a chair into the bedroom and put it in the corner and face it towards the bed, then to sit down. I was tied with my hands behind the back of the chair and my feet in high heels bound together and then my legs bound back to the chair. The doorbell rang and out She went to answer the door. I was in the room for about 15-20 minutes by myself.
In She walked with a submissive behind Her on a collar and leash. She strapped on "Pink Princess" about a 5 inch pink dildo into her harness.
All the while just sitting there knowing what She was going to make me do that night my heart was racing. I had a bit of anxiety and lots of nervousness but I didn't want that to show. As I calmed myself down a bit I began to get aroused in my cage. BTW today marks day 48 in chastity.
The submissive was bent over a bench about 10 feet in front me and Daddy asked me how long it's been since She's fucked me. I said, "Over 50 days" Then She began telling the submissive that he better take her cock good otherwise the sissy (me) wasn't going to give him a blow job at the end.
That's when my stomach sank a bit and more nerves crept in. It's been drilled into my head that this day would come and that I HAVE TO DO A GOOD JOB otherwise I don't get to cum on day 66.
Then She stuck her cock into the submissive bound to the bench. She began slow as he doesn't take large cocks and I began to get jealous. Wanting Her to be fucking me. I know that She loves to fuck me and that this was torment. I was rocking a bit in my chair wishing it was me, but with a bigger dick, or Her feeldoe. She then put on a smaller dick that She could fuck him harder with. She would glance at me with these looks oh "don't you wish this was you?"
Smaller dick on, She started to fuck him hard, he was moaning and I was begging silently. About 10 minutes later She stopped walked over to me and untied me. Told me to walk next to the submissive who was on his belling/all 4's on the bench and for me to lay down and put my head between his legs where his cock and balls hung over my face.
Let me tell you, the fear that was in me in that moment. But I was there to impress Daddy. Then She got close and put Her dick in his ass and I was told to suck on his balls while she pounded him in the ass. He was clean shaven so that was nice. I opened up my mouth and sucked on his balls. His cock started to drip cum on my forehead and into my hair and eye. I kind of felt like moaning but I didn't, I stayed to course.
Daddy stopped, backed up and told the submissive to sit up and me get on my knees. She handcuffed his hands behind his back and stood over me from the side and ordered me to start sucking. I could hear Her in the background saying things like, "Is she doing a good job?" Let her know if she needs to change anything" "Teach her, because she has to learn how to suck cock for me" etc. I focused on Her voice and tried to suck his cock the way I suck Daddy's cock regularly.
There I was on my knees, head bobbing up and down and this man's cock. He had a rather big dick, maybe 8 inches and thick. He was already dripping when I put my lips on it. It helped me to keep my eyes closed most of the time. If I started to gag a bit I'd pull my head off of his cock and keep stroking with my hand. I felt like I was doing a good job and every time Daddy asked the submissive if I was doing a good job he would reply with, "Yes, she's a good sissy". But at the same time I wasn't really sure if I was doing a good job. I lost track of time and started to think should he have cum already? I hope Daddy doesn't punish me for doing a bad job.
But then, I hear the submissive saying I'm going to cum and with his cock in the back of my throat he spurts a big load in my mouth. Maybe 2-3 shots and I swallow immediately just as I started to gag a little bit and was getting a bit grossed out at the same time. When I shut my eyes it helps me not be grossed out by the act of what I'm doing. I pulled his cock out of my mouth and kept stroking it as he shot another load onto my face and in my eyes. Only a few drops fell on the bench and Daddy told me to lick it up, so I did.
I was left on my knees and he was escorted out of the bedroom and soon after left.
Daddy came back in the room and didn't say much at first. Maybe 10 minutes later I was on the bathroom floor and She asked me what I thought of him. I said, he seemed nice enough but I don't know what I'm supposed to think about him because I didn't talk with him any.
She replies, "Good, you're going to be seeing more of him". I literally just couldn't say anything, I didn't like the idea of that and still don't. The only aspect of that idea that I enjoy is that I'm doing it for Her. In the next hour or so I began to get a little sad. I had just done something I had never done and it was something very extreme. It's allowing myself to be that vulnerable, that controlled, that owned and it wasn't easy at all for me to do.
After a little while She brought me back to "normal" I guess you could say. One thing most people don't know is that Daddy has what we refer to as a "darkside". Meaning, She knows how to and sometimes will break me. She's done it before and as we went to bed that night I knew I was a little broken. I love parts of Her darkside, as does She. But it's something we are both learning to operate within. Me and Her are great together because our interests are both all over the map and we both push each other. In the midst of pushing each other we find each others boundaries and not all play is cupcakes and candy. Lots of our play is hardcore, envelope pushing that in reality arouses the both of us to extremes.
Day 65, aka May 19th has been labeled "Day of Hell". I already know I'm going to be put through the ringer to earn Day 66, my release date from chastity and no anal. Truth is, I have no idea what She has in store. Truth is I'm scared shitless, truth is I'm aroused by all of that and I know She is as well. Something tells me She's going to break me and make me keep going and push through for Her.
And I will push through for Her.
Here are 4 pics.
1) Me on all fours over Daddy in my new black crotchless panties and in chastity of course.
2) Me dolled up from Wednesday sucking Daddy's cock.
3) Picture of the bows She tied on the back of my dress (Wednesday night)
4) Photo of me right before all the action (Wednesday night)
You can read my Owner's blog at Mistress Tangent
(To Clarify as some have asked. Daddy is a She, She is my owner. The 2 of us have adopted the roles of She is the Daddy and I am Her girl. So throughout my posts you may see me refer to Her as She and as Daddy)
While at work I got a phone call that once I got home I was going to be all dolled up for Daddy (Wednesday night).
She had gone out and gotten me a brand new wig (sometimes I put in hair extensions), got me some new breast forms among other things. She also brought back some of my things that I still had in my NYC apartment when she was in NYC last week. Some of those things included my pink sissy dress, so I decided to wear that. I thought the night was going to be just me and her, like it usually is but after I was all ready; makeup, hair, lingerie, high heels, locking wrist cuffs, locking heel cuffs, my collar and locked in my dress I was told that our guest would be here soon.
I was told to pull a chair into the bedroom and put it in the corner and face it towards the bed, then to sit down. I was tied with my hands behind the back of the chair and my feet in high heels bound together and then my legs bound back to the chair. The doorbell rang and out She went to answer the door. I was in the room for about 15-20 minutes by myself.
In She walked with a submissive behind Her on a collar and leash. She strapped on "Pink Princess" about a 5 inch pink dildo into her harness.
All the while just sitting there knowing what She was going to make me do that night my heart was racing. I had a bit of anxiety and lots of nervousness but I didn't want that to show. As I calmed myself down a bit I began to get aroused in my cage. BTW today marks day 48 in chastity.
The submissive was bent over a bench about 10 feet in front me and Daddy asked me how long it's been since She's fucked me. I said, "Over 50 days" Then She began telling the submissive that he better take her cock good otherwise the sissy (me) wasn't going to give him a blow job at the end.
That's when my stomach sank a bit and more nerves crept in. It's been drilled into my head that this day would come and that I HAVE TO DO A GOOD JOB otherwise I don't get to cum on day 66.
Then She stuck her cock into the submissive bound to the bench. She began slow as he doesn't take large cocks and I began to get jealous. Wanting Her to be fucking me. I know that She loves to fuck me and that this was torment. I was rocking a bit in my chair wishing it was me, but with a bigger dick, or Her feeldoe. She then put on a smaller dick that She could fuck him harder with. She would glance at me with these looks oh "don't you wish this was you?"
Smaller dick on, She started to fuck him hard, he was moaning and I was begging silently. About 10 minutes later She stopped walked over to me and untied me. Told me to walk next to the submissive who was on his belling/all 4's on the bench and for me to lay down and put my head between his legs where his cock and balls hung over my face.
Let me tell you, the fear that was in me in that moment. But I was there to impress Daddy. Then She got close and put Her dick in his ass and I was told to suck on his balls while she pounded him in the ass. He was clean shaven so that was nice. I opened up my mouth and sucked on his balls. His cock started to drip cum on my forehead and into my hair and eye. I kind of felt like moaning but I didn't, I stayed to course.
Daddy stopped, backed up and told the submissive to sit up and me get on my knees. She handcuffed his hands behind his back and stood over me from the side and ordered me to start sucking. I could hear Her in the background saying things like, "Is she doing a good job?" Let her know if she needs to change anything" "Teach her, because she has to learn how to suck cock for me" etc. I focused on Her voice and tried to suck his cock the way I suck Daddy's cock regularly.
There I was on my knees, head bobbing up and down and this man's cock. He had a rather big dick, maybe 8 inches and thick. He was already dripping when I put my lips on it. It helped me to keep my eyes closed most of the time. If I started to gag a bit I'd pull my head off of his cock and keep stroking with my hand. I felt like I was doing a good job and every time Daddy asked the submissive if I was doing a good job he would reply with, "Yes, she's a good sissy". But at the same time I wasn't really sure if I was doing a good job. I lost track of time and started to think should he have cum already? I hope Daddy doesn't punish me for doing a bad job.
But then, I hear the submissive saying I'm going to cum and with his cock in the back of my throat he spurts a big load in my mouth. Maybe 2-3 shots and I swallow immediately just as I started to gag a little bit and was getting a bit grossed out at the same time. When I shut my eyes it helps me not be grossed out by the act of what I'm doing. I pulled his cock out of my mouth and kept stroking it as he shot another load onto my face and in my eyes. Only a few drops fell on the bench and Daddy told me to lick it up, so I did.
I was left on my knees and he was escorted out of the bedroom and soon after left.
Daddy came back in the room and didn't say much at first. Maybe 10 minutes later I was on the bathroom floor and She asked me what I thought of him. I said, he seemed nice enough but I don't know what I'm supposed to think about him because I didn't talk with him any.
She replies, "Good, you're going to be seeing more of him". I literally just couldn't say anything, I didn't like the idea of that and still don't. The only aspect of that idea that I enjoy is that I'm doing it for Her. In the next hour or so I began to get a little sad. I had just done something I had never done and it was something very extreme. It's allowing myself to be that vulnerable, that controlled, that owned and it wasn't easy at all for me to do.
After a little while She brought me back to "normal" I guess you could say. One thing most people don't know is that Daddy has what we refer to as a "darkside". Meaning, She knows how to and sometimes will break me. She's done it before and as we went to bed that night I knew I was a little broken. I love parts of Her darkside, as does She. But it's something we are both learning to operate within. Me and Her are great together because our interests are both all over the map and we both push each other. In the midst of pushing each other we find each others boundaries and not all play is cupcakes and candy. Lots of our play is hardcore, envelope pushing that in reality arouses the both of us to extremes.
Day 65, aka May 19th has been labeled "Day of Hell". I already know I'm going to be put through the ringer to earn Day 66, my release date from chastity and no anal. Truth is, I have no idea what She has in store. Truth is I'm scared shitless, truth is I'm aroused by all of that and I know She is as well. Something tells me She's going to break me and make me keep going and push through for Her.
And I will push through for Her.
Here are 4 pics.
1) Me on all fours over Daddy in my new black crotchless panties and in chastity of course.
2) Me dolled up from Wednesday sucking Daddy's cock.
3) Picture of the bows She tied on the back of my dress (Wednesday night)
4) Photo of me right before all the action (Wednesday night)
You can read my Owner's blog at Mistress Tangent
Sunday, April 27, 2014
Daddy Back Home
I don't think people realize just how difficult it is to 1 be a slave and 2 be a cuckold. Both are actually relatively new to me. I mean I've been a submissive and a fetishist for years but I've never been a slave. And to me the term is over used. A slave to an owner is commitment and devotion and is something that is earned over a period of time.
With that rambling, I'm going to say that I've been drinking heavily today/tonight as I write this blog.
I'm 27. Keep that in mind... I'm not an older man who stumbled into bdsm. I'm a guy who has been a fetish model, a person that is recognized in the community, someone who in my own right is a younger, good looking person.... and yet I chose to be a slave. I'm kinky to the core. I'm 46 days in straight chastity and in part is a large reason why I'm writing this post that is admittedly scatter-brained from alcohol.
Anyone that knows me personally, or has worked with me in photos or videos knows about me and my body. I've always celebrated my body but just like most others, I am insecure about my own body. I'm a 27 year old male who was born with Klinefelters, something that makes my body truly feminine; naturally limited body hair, no facial hair, put on weight in my hips and thighs like a woman, small hands and feet, non-developed testicles plus more. I'm someone who has always desired femininity in everything including myself to the point where I took Estrogen for 6 weeks at the age of 23 as I seriously considered transitioning. I'm someone who desires sex but not the way most men do. I'm admittedly the bottom.
Finding someone, particularly a natural born woman who not only accepts but appreciates and can love me for all that I am is more difficult that one could imagine. Perhaps I am a natural born sissy. And that's essentially where I find myself today. A slave to a woman that means the world to me, more than I'm going to put into writing on my blog. She really loves for me to be her girl, she's my daddy and I'm her girl. Yet, I hold on to a piece of fear.
I'm not what she wants in a man. To be honest I'm not much of a man. Of course I can pass in any situation as need be but my desire to be a man is very little. Beyond being her slave this is very scary. As much as she wants and desires me to be her girl, how much can I fulfill is a fear.
Then comes being a cuckold. It's a love hate thing for myself. I love for her to be pleased I do. But, I'm learning my place in that dynamic. And I'm learning that I'm still important and desired by her in that dynamic.
I'm a leave this for tonight. Gotta go to bed but had to write some of whats on my mind. I'm excited to have Daddy back home tomorrow night.
With that rambling, I'm going to say that I've been drinking heavily today/tonight as I write this blog.
I'm 27. Keep that in mind... I'm not an older man who stumbled into bdsm. I'm a guy who has been a fetish model, a person that is recognized in the community, someone who in my own right is a younger, good looking person.... and yet I chose to be a slave. I'm kinky to the core. I'm 46 days in straight chastity and in part is a large reason why I'm writing this post that is admittedly scatter-brained from alcohol.
Anyone that knows me personally, or has worked with me in photos or videos knows about me and my body. I've always celebrated my body but just like most others, I am insecure about my own body. I'm a 27 year old male who was born with Klinefelters, something that makes my body truly feminine; naturally limited body hair, no facial hair, put on weight in my hips and thighs like a woman, small hands and feet, non-developed testicles plus more. I'm someone who has always desired femininity in everything including myself to the point where I took Estrogen for 6 weeks at the age of 23 as I seriously considered transitioning. I'm someone who desires sex but not the way most men do. I'm admittedly the bottom.
Finding someone, particularly a natural born woman who not only accepts but appreciates and can love me for all that I am is more difficult that one could imagine. Perhaps I am a natural born sissy. And that's essentially where I find myself today. A slave to a woman that means the world to me, more than I'm going to put into writing on my blog. She really loves for me to be her girl, she's my daddy and I'm her girl. Yet, I hold on to a piece of fear.
I'm not what she wants in a man. To be honest I'm not much of a man. Of course I can pass in any situation as need be but my desire to be a man is very little. Beyond being her slave this is very scary. As much as she wants and desires me to be her girl, how much can I fulfill is a fear.
Then comes being a cuckold. It's a love hate thing for myself. I love for her to be pleased I do. But, I'm learning my place in that dynamic. And I'm learning that I'm still important and desired by her in that dynamic.
I'm a leave this for tonight. Gotta go to bed but had to write some of whats on my mind. I'm excited to have Daddy back home tomorrow night.
Sunday, February 23, 2014
Call Me Slave
Yes, that's correct, call me slave.
I've been serving Mistress Tangent for 18 months now and I just recently made it public, at least in the kink world that I am Her slave. I've never been in my life and there was even a point where I told Miss that I could never be a slave because I was more of a sub/bottom/kinkster/fetishist etc. but not a slave. We laugh about that these days. At that time I really didn't think I could ever be a slave but we have evolved together and our foundation was built on trust from the get go.
Our views on BDSM have always been aligned rather well. We are both extremely well rounded when it comes to kink and we find ourselves indulging in scenarios that our new to the both of us frequently.
I've been around for some time now in the BDSM world. I'm 27 now and proudly, willingly and freely give myself to Her. I give all of myself to Her. On the flip side of the coin She holds me close, as Hers, as Her slave and proudly. That means the world to me. Our relationship is ever growing and evolving. It would be fair to say it's a complex relationship but that's also part of what makes it so great.
We are both strong minded people but we compliment each other very well in different ways.
We push one another. I take care of her; needs, wants, desires all included. She challenges me to be a better person and she also challenges my 'limits', to push past them. I love, absolutely love to push past 'limits' for Her. I get such great pleasure out of seeing Her get 'high' on that. I also push Her to be a better person and push Her as a Dominant to go to new heights and ultimately we encourage one another.
We're still figuring us out. Every D/s relationship is different.
Dominant and slave is a part of who we are to one-another. But what makes that part of us together so great is the bond we share.
I've been serving Mistress Tangent for 18 months now and I just recently made it public, at least in the kink world that I am Her slave. I've never been in my life and there was even a point where I told Miss that I could never be a slave because I was more of a sub/bottom/kinkster/fetishist etc. but not a slave. We laugh about that these days. At that time I really didn't think I could ever be a slave but we have evolved together and our foundation was built on trust from the get go.
Our views on BDSM have always been aligned rather well. We are both extremely well rounded when it comes to kink and we find ourselves indulging in scenarios that our new to the both of us frequently.
I've been around for some time now in the BDSM world. I'm 27 now and proudly, willingly and freely give myself to Her. I give all of myself to Her. On the flip side of the coin She holds me close, as Hers, as Her slave and proudly. That means the world to me. Our relationship is ever growing and evolving. It would be fair to say it's a complex relationship but that's also part of what makes it so great.
We are both strong minded people but we compliment each other very well in different ways.
We push one another. I take care of her; needs, wants, desires all included. She challenges me to be a better person and she also challenges my 'limits', to push past them. I love, absolutely love to push past 'limits' for Her. I get such great pleasure out of seeing Her get 'high' on that. I also push Her to be a better person and push Her as a Dominant to go to new heights and ultimately we encourage one another.
We're still figuring us out. Every D/s relationship is different.
Dominant and slave is a part of who we are to one-another. But what makes that part of us together so great is the bond we share.
After caning from punishment - Miss Grabbing whats Her's
Some late night rope bondage practice. Chest harness & twine face bondage
Adjusting CB while in diaper in car right before sushi. (Not sure why my hair looks several colors)
Random-fun pic.
Another view after the punishment caning
Bound position Miss had me in for the punishment so I couldn't squirm. Will be great for fucking too.
After I had wisdom tooth pulled. Miss took care of me for few days, fun pic I sent Her as She bought baby food.
Shock collar literally bought for dog training. But it has it's dual purpose and this is us testing it out on my balls.
Thursday, December 26, 2013
Her Christmas Gift - My Body
More than that, connecting with the person that is putting you through that pain makes it all the better.It can be rare to connect with someone on that level. Beyond the physical gifts of Christmas I wanted to give my dominant a gift of my body for her pleasure. On top of all of this, this would be the first time she has single tailed me....
As we left for the dungeon and got into the garage she put on my knees, put on my stainless steel collar and then threw on the handcuffs. I stood up and was told to get into the trunk.... It was about a 7 mile commute and I could tell that we were at the dungeon because of the gravel. So then it was odd for her to get out of the car and leave me in there for about 10 minutes or so. I definitely then started to guess how long she was going to leave me in the trunk.
Then, I hear her foot steps as she popped the truck. She attached the metal lead around my collar and lead me into the dungeon. I was ordered to change and then to put on these new clothes. That being white panties, white little girls training bra and a 4 inch school school-girl mini skirt. I got on my knees and waited....................
She guided me to a electronic suspension rig. Cuffed me up and started with 1 flogger, then another and another. All got more violent with more intensity. Some while into it I was moved over to the cross and the she started with a dragon tail on my back and butt.
Then, up to the single tail and she just went at me.......
I did tell her several months earlier that I always wanted bloody white panties..... She listens.
She got into a good vibe and awhile into it I screamed out her name. She asked "What" with an attitude. I was literally about to ask her for a break but for some reason my lips said something else out loud - "Merry Christmas". I could feel the tingles of pleasure run through her body and as a strong moment of connection - a mutual high that the both of us shared together. That followed with her just whipping my ass profusely and I just taking it for her.
( Unfortunately, we were on a time restraint with this being the day before Christmas Eve). She then noticed that we had to run very soon and I was informed that I was going to be beat HARD for 2 minutes to wrap things up.
By this point I was rather extended and I yelled, moaned, and begged with every slash. In the end, she left me with bloody white panties, bloody white bra and with a pain high but more importantly satisfaction because I knew that she got a great pleasure from this present of my body.
I know there will be a round 2 in the near future. As much as I fear it I can't wait for it like a kid on Christmas Eve.
Merry Christmas
Sunday, November 10, 2013
Mistress Tangent
I want to share a website / blog with all of you to check out.
Mistress Tangent is a really good friend of mine. She's a Femdom from Phoenix but travels all over and she recently (as of a couple months ago) started a website and also has a diary/blog similar to mine on her website.
For all of you kinksters out there that love to worship a beautiful and truly kinky dominant woman I highly suggest you taking a look at her site - MistressTangent
I've been in the BDSM world for 10 years now and there are a lot of beautiful women but some of them aren't as kinky as they put off. Mistress Tangent is a kinky as she puts off if not kinkier and so I have to show love and support here on my blog.
Mistress Tangent is a really good friend of mine. She's a Femdom from Phoenix but travels all over and she recently (as of a couple months ago) started a website and also has a diary/blog similar to mine on her website.
For all of you kinksters out there that love to worship a beautiful and truly kinky dominant woman I highly suggest you taking a look at her site - MistressTangent
I've been in the BDSM world for 10 years now and there are a lot of beautiful women but some of them aren't as kinky as they put off. Mistress Tangent is a kinky as she puts off if not kinkier and so I have to show love and support here on my blog.
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