It's Go Time - You're My Cuck Tonight

"It's Go time!!!!
Hurry up, grab the red bag, the bondage cuffs and make sure to wear cute panties.
Bring my strap-on and hurry up, it's Go time!!!"

That's the call I got on Sunday night after Miss aka my Daddy aka my owner was out at a BBQ and it was finally time. I was going to be her cuckold. For me it was a moment of excitement and nervousness. I started grabbing all of the necessary items as She requested and I got another phone call from Her saying to hurry up.

I arrived at the house where she was with him. I made sure I looked good that night, even though I knew what was about to happen there is still a sense of pride in me. I walked to the door, he had his shirt off already and was grabbing on her. A few knots in my stomach but overall it was a rather comfortable setting. We gathered in the kitchen and had a few drinks together to talk and get to know each other a little bit and to be honest, probably relax us all a bit. This was a first time for all of us.

When I saw them caress each other even standing I got knots in my stomach but I knew my place. We had to make a quick run to the store and Miss suggested that we all go. I was the driver, Miss slid in the back sear and for some reason I naturally thought he would get in the seat next to me up front but he got in the back seat with her. Of course, that made sense but for some reason it didn't cross my mind in the moment. We all chatted a bit, I was asked to turn up the music a bit and they made out. It was a very weird feeling for me. I was like nooooo but again I knew my place and I understood what was going on. I just drove and listened while at the same time could feel Miss's touch on my arm here and there.

We get back to the house, go into the living room and they start making out. I'm instructed to strip down to my panties and just watch. A few minutes later we step outside I'm told to sit/lay on the outside furtniture. Miss lays on top of me and he gets on top of her for more foreplay for a few minutes. He grabbed a quick smoke and we made our way to his bedroom.

I'm immediately told to get on my knees in the corner and it starts. He undresses her more, he gets undress and he even starts to ask me questions in a teasing way.

"You like it on your knees sissy?" - Yes.
"Oh, She feels so good, do you like watching me please your Miss?" Yes, please, please Her!

Foreplay continued and suddenly all I wanted was for him to please Her. Seriously, deep inside of me I wanted to see my Owner be pleased by another man. Me-on my knees, Her sissy just watching and yearning to see Her truly pleased. I was getting such a high, such a pleasure from all of this.
I could see the pleasure Miss was receiving from Her control, Her dominance, my submission and our bond. It was ecstasy!!!!!

The next time I'm sure will be sooner than later and it's something I'm looking forward to. It's something I'm not fearing because it was something we enjoyed together. That level of trust in each other, the attention to detail Miss gave me throughout by slight rubs on my arm, telling me to get closer, ordering me to show him how a sissy really sucks Her dick (strap-on), to having me get closer for a better view. There was a point where I got on all fours with my head down on the floor as I had gone into such a great sub space. I was Her slave to be done with as She pleased.

-----

Right now I write this 12 days after that night. Daddy is in California for the weekend working and I'm yearning for Daddy. Daddy is a name She has taken on, I'm her girl and She is my Daddy. And truth be it Daddy has a high level of masculine tendencies and I have a high level of feminine tendencies. We compliment each other very well in my facets and our BDSM side of our relationship is a part of our everyday, we are lifestyle. But more and more I'm becoming more comfortable with being Daddy's slave as well as Her girl. I can't explain the feeling it gives me inside and I can't explain how I need to please Daddy. It just is a part of me and it's a part of us.

On top of all this today is the 27th straight day in chastity. The previous longest I had ever gone is 13 days. Daddy told me I don't get out until day 66. Day 66!!!!! And I'm not allowed ANY anal of any kind until day 66.

As much as that # ran through my head for days I love that I'm challenged and I love that I'm able to please Daddy in the process. More to come on this and the life of Mistress Tangent (Daddy) and Autoeroticboy (girl) soon.

Below are pictures of the bruises I had on both of my thighs during the cuckold scene from a punishment and the chastity I was in during the scene and what I'm still in as I write this, 27 days in. The photo is from my last orgasm, I cam while in my CB from the hitachi.... 1st time EVER!
BTW.... I have not had an orgasm from a jacking off motion and or sex of any kind since February 1st. That's right, over 2 months ago.

That is devotion to my Owner.

Call Me Slave

Yes, that's correct, call me slave.

I've been serving Mistress Tangent for 18 months now and I just recently made it public, at least in the kink world that I am Her slave. I've never been in my life and there was even a point where I told Miss that I could never be a slave because I was more of a sub/bottom/kinkster/fetishist etc. but not a slave. We laugh about that these days. At that time I really didn't think I could ever be a slave but we have evolved together and our foundation was built on trust from the get go.

Our views on BDSM have always been aligned rather well. We are both extremely well rounded when it comes to kink and we find ourselves indulging in scenarios that our new to the both of us frequently.

I've been around for some time now in the BDSM world. I'm 27 now and proudly, willingly and freely give myself to Her. I give all of myself to Her. On the flip side of the coin She holds me close, as Hers, as Her slave and proudly. That means the world to me. Our relationship is ever growing and evolving. It would be fair to say it's a complex relationship but that's also part of what makes it so great.

We are both strong minded people but we compliment each other very well in different ways.
We push one another. I take care of her; needs, wants, desires all included. She challenges me to be a better person and she also challenges my 'limits', to push past them. I love, absolutely love to push past 'limits' for Her. I get such great pleasure out of seeing Her get 'high' on that. I also push Her to be a better person and push Her as a Dominant to go to new heights and ultimately we encourage one another.

We're still figuring us out. Every D/s relationship is different.
Dominant and slave is a part of who we are to one-another. But what makes that part of us together so great is the bond we share.

 After caning from punishment - Miss Grabbing whats Her's

 Some late night rope bondage practice. Chest harness & twine face bondage

 Adjusting CB while in diaper in car right before sushi. (Not sure why my hair looks several colors)

 Random-fun pic.

 Another view after the punishment caning

 Bound position Miss had me in for the punishment so I couldn't squirm. Will be great for fucking too.

 After I had wisdom tooth pulled. Miss took care of me for few days, fun pic I sent Her as She bought baby food.

Shock collar literally bought for dog training. But it has it's dual purpose and this is us testing it out on my balls.

Her Christmas Gift - My Body

My dominant - Mistress Tangent is a sadist and I can be a masochist, with the key word there being 'can'. Most people when they meet me think I am a masochist due to all my film work taking pain and due to my tattoos, but the truth of the matter is that pain in a BDSM context isn't that high on my list. I can endure and the more I do it I can start to build a bit of a tolerance and the pain high is amazing.

More than that, connecting with the person that is putting you through that pain makes it all the better.

It can be rare to connect with someone on that level. Beyond the physical gifts of Christmas I wanted to give my dominant a gift of my body for her pleasure. On top of all of this, this would be the first time she has single tailed me....

As we left for the dungeon and got into the garage she put on my knees, put on my stainless steel collar and then threw on the handcuffs. I stood up and was told to get into the trunk.... It was about a 7 mile commute and I could tell that we were at the dungeon because of the gravel. So then it was odd for her to get out of the car and leave me in there for about 10 minutes or so. I definitely then started to guess how long she was going to leave me in the trunk.

Then, I hear her foot steps as she popped the truck. She attached the metal lead around my collar and lead me into the dungeon. I was ordered to change and then to put on these new clothes. That being white panties, white little girls training bra and a 4 inch school school-girl mini skirt. I got on my knees and waited....................

She guided me to a electronic suspension rig. Cuffed me up and started with 1 flogger, then another and another. All got more violent with more intensity. Some while into it I was moved over to the cross and the she started with a dragon tail on my back and butt.

Then, up to the single tail and she just went at me.......

I did tell her several months earlier that I always wanted bloody white panties..... She listens.

She got into a good vibe and awhile into it I screamed out her name. She asked "What" with an attitude. I was literally about to ask her for a break but for some reason my lips said something else out loud - "Merry Christmas". I could feel the tingles of pleasure run through her body and as a strong moment of connection - a mutual high that the both of us shared together. That followed with her just whipping my ass profusely and I just taking it for her.

( Unfortunately, we were on a time restraint with this being the day before Christmas Eve). She then noticed that we had to run very soon and I was informed that I was going to be beat HARD for 2 minutes to wrap things up.
By this point I was rather extended and I yelled, moaned, and begged with every slash. In the end, she left me with bloody white panties, bloody white bra and with a pain high but more importantly satisfaction because I knew that she got a great pleasure from this present of my body.

I know there will be a round 2 in the near future. As much as I fear it I can't wait for it like a kid on Christmas Eve.

Merry Christmas

Phoenix - I'm Coming Back

June 2013 I left Phoenix for New York City for a job offer. December 1st, 2013 I'll be back living in Phoenix still working with the same company but in Phoenix.

I'm very much looking forward to moving back to Arizona and the timing is great because it's starting to get cold in NYC. The first time I moved to Phoenix I literally didn't know anyone. Now I know a lot of people, have some friends there, know the city, theres a lot of opportunity for me there and my play partner is there.

Anyone that knows me or knows me from my blog probably gets the sense that I get around. Just in the past 4 years I've lived in Chicago, Ohio, Phoenix, and NYC. On top of that I travel a pretty good amount and made a trip across the country in U-Haul. Moving, traveling etc. can have it's perks but I'm looking to settle down and stay put for awhile and so I'm excited to be heading back to Phoenix.

Pushed

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Cabin Valentines Fling

West Virginia was a lot of fun, actually even better than I thought it would be. We got there Friday night around 10. It was a bit north of Huntington West Virginia. The Cabin is huge the only thing it was missing was a hot tub but we were in a State Park so you only get so much. We drank every night and for the most part it was just the 4 of us except for Sunday night. Since it was Valentines weekend lots of their friends were busy.

Friday night...

After some drinking we all crashed. Gay boy (happens to have a big crush on me) and I slept downstairs in one of the big beds. It was his b-day so he got the best room as it had a walk-in bathroom as well. So I got in bed as usual and within minutes he asks if I'm naked. I said no, I'm in my boxers. He says, I'm naked and you should get naked. I thought I'll amuse him a bit and so I got naked. He started asking some questions and he put is arm around me and asked if I like my ass played with. I said, of course!
Now I've done a lot of anal with myself and women but I should've known that a gay boy knew what he was doing because it felt fucking fantastic. But, no I didn't give it up, I let him finger me. I actually got hard and was pretty close to cuming. At the same time I was exhausted and figured we got 2 more nights so we stopped and went to sleep.

Saturday night...
Wake up in the mid afternoon and a few hours later we started the drinking. In the midst of that I had this idea that we should climb the rafters because it looked like fun. With some planning and my brilliant ideas we were able to get one of the girls up there. Birthday boy was freaking out but it was funny and a success. I thought it would be hot to have sex up there. I said that I would tie up the girl so that she wouldn't fall and then I could just fuck her.
Then we got back to drinking and Saturday we drank a lot... Lots of Tequilla shots. All 4 of us sat down on the couch. From left to right it went girl, me, boy, girl. I had to at least be next to the boy because he has a crush and it's his birthday. Slightly into the movie me and the girl to my left who also climbed the rafters just started making out. Kissing, nimbling, biting, kissing, touching and yet I felt bad cause the boy to my right wanted me and she felt bad cause that was her best friend. We started to whisper about that but couldn't resist so we moved our fling into her bedroom. We're in there maybe 5 minutes and the next thing I know the boy is at the door cock-blocking me. We ignored him at first and at the same time we both thought it was funny.
We thought he had condoms because he said he did but then yells... "I don't have condoms for you two" he didn't want to give them to us cause he was jealous. I don't have sex without condoms, it doesn't happen, especially when it's a fling. He continued to say things to us through the door while we had some good oral sex and then we came back out to watch another movie to please him. But, I honestly just thought it was hilarious. We couldn't stay off of each other and went back to kissing on the couch hahaha lol.

Sunday Night...
They had some friends over and the Grammy's were on so we had a Grammy Party. I didn't drink too much cause we had to be out by 10am Monday and I had classes in the afternoon in Ohio. Although, I did get a little buzzed I must admit. Everyone else drank a good amount including birthday boy. In fact he got trashed... why he waited to Sunday to get so drunk beats me. Later in the night the 4 of us are sitting on the couch again I was between the girl I was having a fling with and the boy. He grabs my arm and puts it around him and proceeds to ask. "Will you sleep in my bed with me tonight" I hesitated for one second and she says, "No, he is sleeping with me". I just kept my mouth shut because I didn't know what to say. I wanted to sleep in her bed again. So, I thought if he keeps drinking he'll just pass out somewhere. I was right, we went back to having a few drinks and I hold my liquor much better than he does. Me and the fling girl went back to having our weekend fling and he went to the bathroom where he didn't come out until the next morning as he threw up and slept next to the toilet.

Overall it was a fun weekend. I had a weekend valentine which was a pleasant surprise to an already good weekend and I'll see them come Spring when they come to visit me in Athens.

This weekend I'm heading to D.C. with my friend "Bobcat". We are heading there after we both get out of class Thursday night so we should be into D.C. about 1-2am. We won't be going home till Monday sometime.

I'm setting up sessions for myself and taking doubles with both Nikki Domino of Baltimore and with Andriana Santos from Atlanta who is in town for the kinky weekend event Dark Odyssey. I'm also going to be doing some photo shoots with Nikki Domino. It's going to be a busy, kinky working and yet fun weekend. I'm looking forward to it.

If anyone is interested in booking something with me feel free to email me at
morgankeni4@gmail.com

More Pictures:

Webcam

Last night was my 1st time doing webcam and it was a lot of fun. I do a lot of kinky crazy things to myself anyways and it's fun to give the power to someone else and know that they are getting off to me.
I created an account with www.livejasmin.com and it took about 10 days for everything to get approved with my ID pictures and so forth. If you want to chat and or watch some live shows of me there you can find me under AUTOEROTICBOY

Last night I was only planning on being on for about an hour but it turned into almost 2 hours as time just flew by. It took me a minute to get used to how things work and then it was fun. I started off with my favorite anal toy already in me to be a ready to stick some bigger toys up there. One guy wanted to see some dildo sucking and worship and then I fucked myself and I know he enjoyed that as did I. Some guys just loved looking at my tattoos and talking about worshiping my body.

Anything I'd do in private I'll do on cam so I'm sure this will be a new fun adventure for all involved. I actually have a scat scene tonight at 8 with this guy I met on there last night. I didn't have to "go" last night so I told him we could do tonight and what do you know, I really have to go. In fact I've had to go for hours so I can't wait for 8pm to get here, only an hour to go. He was also interested in using diapers and I just happen to have some so he will get a good show tonight.

I'm probably going to be setting up a schedule on the site but if your interested in doing some private play with me feel free to send me an email to
Autoeroticboy@yahoo.com
and we will set something up

Again here is my info to watching me on webcam...
Autoeroticboy
wwwlivejasmin.com

How to - Make Breasts

I've been requested to write about this and I've been asked the question, "How do you make your boobs?" so many times I wouldn't even attempt to count them.
A little background... When I was a teenager I used to just stuff like like many cross dressers do and some girls of course. When I was 19 I was approached by a drag queen in Chicago by the drag name of Tina Torch. She wanted to do drag make up on me so one day we got together and later that night I went out to The Continuum fetish party in Chicago. There's a picture below of what I looked like that night.

It was then that I learned how to do the way I do my boobs now. You really don't need much, the most important thing is duct tape. Yes, the solution to everything.... duct tape.

Before you do anything push your chest/tits together and you'll get an idea of what you can create. Then take duct tape and before you rip off a piece measure about how long of a piece you need. I wrap the duct tape about an inch or 2 behind my side/past where my arm hangs down. Rip off about 3 pieces at this length and then 1 maybe 2 pieces that are about 4-6 inches shorter.

Note: This is much easier if you have someone to help you, but practice and you'll get a hang off it.

1. Take a long piece of tape and place the end about 2 inches behind your side. Push the tape onto your body to the side of your chest. Then take your chest and push it together like your making cleavage. Push together as much as possible and with your other hand pull the tape the rest of the way and make it as tight as possible. (The tape should be just under your nipples)

2. The 2nd piece of tape should start just a tad further onto your side than the 1st piece so that it grips some skin as well. This piece is easier than the 1st. Squeeze chest together again and pull the tape and make it tight.

3. You may not have to put another long piece of tape on but if it feels like you need it do it again.

4. I then use a shorter piece of tape just to sure things up.

5. Put on your choice of bra.

6. Stuff. You can use breast forms if you have them. They are usually best but socks work as well. But whatever you use to stuff push it down and just fill space. Your chest that has been created into breasts already takes up a good amount of space, now your just filling leftover space.

7. Probably the simplest step is to take a little make up that's just a tad darker than your skin color. With a brush apply that into your cleavage. Blend it into your skin. This creates a dimension that makes your breasts look larger and realer than they are.

I'll need to do a video of this and you'll get an even better idea of how to do this. None the less try this out. Practice helps for any cross dresser. Although, real girls also use this tip sometimes. I actually taught a girl with smaller breasts how to do this and she loved me for it.

This is actually best if you have a little fat in your chest. If you don't have any fat this still helps it's just a tad more difficult but trust me this is the key to beautiful fake breasts.

Taking it off. Can hurt a little bit. If your sweating a bit it actually doesn't hurt at all. Taking a shower with the tape on can help out a lot as well and then just remove it in the shower. But, ask any girl.... Beauty = Pain.

Drag Queen picture & then a close up of my fake breasts.

7 week Road Trip part 1

After Ithaca, New York I was off to Philly. It was my first time there since I was a child, I wish I had more time than a 1/2 a day there. I'll definitely be back. Miss Lydia Rules was nice enough to meet up with me and I crashed at Coral Korrupts place. Coral was already in DC where I was heading the next day. Lydia is into Lolita fashion and she had a dress that she had ordered a bit large so we played a little dress up. Overall it fit pretty good so I have a better idea of what size to get when I start my Lolita collection. My friend, we'll call him "Bobcat" likes electrical play and he saw that Coral had a cattle prod and asked me if I would use it on him. I was like, are you sure and he was game. That was fun lol :) I shocked him on his ass a few times and boy did he jump but at the same time he enjoyed it. I haven't tried it yet, I try to avoid using it on me that is.

Then it was on to DC in the morning. Bobcat drove back home and Lydia and I were on our way to the "Slave Party" hosted by Lexi Sindel. There were 5 Dommes, Lexi Sindel, Coral Korrupt, Lydia Rules, Jenni Fishnets, and Nikki Domino. I had known them all except for Nikki at the time. A good amount of guys showed up but Lexi's 2 personal slaves that were there and I only helped out with the party. The party was for the other guys attending. Eventually they all went downstairs to play and the 3 of us were left by all the food and alcohol so of course I indulged. As the night got late I ended up playing just a little bit with Nikki and it's safe to say Nikki and I had a really good time that night. She's really cool and enjoyable to be around.

I ended up staying in DC with Lexi to film for 12 days. In that time I shot with Lexi, Victoria Sapphire from Columbus, Ohio and Nikki Domino. A ball kicking submissive was also there for a few shoots, and Cybil Troy and her slave from New York were in town for a few days as well.

I'm trying to recall all the scenes I did while there:
- w/ Lexi as Santa strap-on and heavy bondage
- w/ Lexi wrestling
- w/ Lexi boot worship
- w/ Lexi & Victoria double strap-on
- w/ Lexi and Victoria self cock sucking
- w/ Victoria heavy flogging
- w/ Victoria Whipping
- w/ Victoria Caning (first time I've ever cried during a scene & I cried a lot)
- w/ Victoria CBT, S&M scene and bondage
- w/ Victoria boot worship
- w/ Nikki Domino Strap-on
------------- I think that's all of them and then I just helped out when other people were in town.
Lexi had me serving her on a more regular basis while I was there. We had discussed working out a D/s relationship between us on a more regular basis. I have a few play partners but I've been keeping my eyes open to playing more regularly and more intense with someone. Lexi and I have discussed things a bit and neither of us want to jump into something because I take a D/s relationship seriously but things seem to be heading in a positive direction with us.

I'll wrap up the rest of my trip in my next journal.
But here's a picture of Lexi as Santa with her submissive.... Me.

Ramble, friendship, & Groups

I miss being around more types of people I relate too. I've always been the person who relates to all different kinds of people and I think that's one of my best traits but everyone still has their niche, I guess that's the best way to put it. The "groups" of people I associate with tend to be so diverse from each other and maybe that's why I find, finding someone I completely relate to a bit annoying.

Some of the crowds I tend to follow.... Kink without a doubt is something that's very much a part of my life. Hip hop - I love the music and lifestyle, the in depth picture created by lyricists. Tattoos - I've always loved art and tattoos for me are a great form of expression and beautiful in themselves. Athletics - I love my sports, I can't lie. Love the Steelers, Cubs and Bulls. I also enjoy playing athletics myself, it's good entertainment, exercise and I enjoy competition. Cross-dressing, it's something I've done my entire life. I do it in the kink community but also enjoy it beyond the kink community. Fashion, letting loose, and being femme is enjoyable to me.

Then I have my friends I grew up with. I'm very-very lucky to have such a good group of friends. Jamal, Andrew, Chris, Adrian, and Walter. All of which know me very well. I don't hide things, well I opened up to all of them when I was 19, 20 and they have all been great. All of them are what you would call "vanilla" but all very open minded and I love them all. They all live in Chicago and I definitely miss being around my group of friends that I've had for a long time. Maybe that's all it is.

I'm still in Ithaca, leave Friday so one more day. I'm excited to get to Philly and then to DC. I'm actually really excited for the rest of my school break. Then I may make a pitt stop in Pittsburgh to see a "friend" who in a very different way has become the person who is most close to me over the past year. I was in a long-term relationship and we split a part in September/October 2009. It took awhile to get back to "normal" and when I was back to 100% I stumbled across someone who makes me smile. So other than missing my friends in Chicago I find this person in Pittsburgh to be someone I look forward to seeing every time I do see her and someone I care about.

I know this is a bit of a ramble but I think we all have these every once in awhile. So I'm a end it on that.